Ahem, my theory that I have, that is to say, ahem, which is mine, is that all the puerile retards, crazies and god-sucking, fish-gobbling fascists who are up in arms about this pongy, downdumbed, tenth-rate, ugly mainstream SHITE need a good bunnying in their unwashed Christian bunnies. Because, although the vast majority of their hopeless, mentally defective, ill-educated flock can’t even read Brown’s simple-minded, tiresome, turgid, verbose, ill-written outpourings, they are able to sit zombie-like, gobbling disgusting popcorn and sucking on foul Coke (and whatever else) while proudly and noisily "mobiling" and "texting" friends and family that this product (oops, "film") has braindrained them over to the forces of atheistic leeeb'ral darkness. And I'm enchanted also that the American albino rights groups are annoyed as well - screw them.
(On a lighter note, dears, a Hanks snuff movie might actually be an eminently interesting proposition...)
Well, that’s it. That’s my theory. Ahem. My theory that belongs to me.